Gut Instinct
by PandaFire McMango
Summary: Collins thinks about Angel and other past relationships...just a thought that struckme, Collins's doubts and all that. AngelCollins definetly, and MaureenCollins friendship! oneshot


Collins sat back as Benny talked on and on about some new studio deal he had going on. Mark and Roger were getting pretty pissed, Collins could see that. Mark's face was red, and Roger was drumming his fingers (never a good sign, especially with Roger). Benny didn't seem to notice just how angry his former friends were getting. Benny wasn't noticing a lot of things actually, like how badly he sold out and how different he'd become. But this Benny thing wasn't on Collins's mind right now. What was on his mind was sitting next to him, wearing a red-and-white Santa coat and a black wig.

Collins had been thinking about…_puzzling _about Angel all night. Ever since the moment he had looked up and seen, in the dim light that filtered into the back alley, the young, effeminate man, he had been mentally spinning in circles. There was an attraction, that was certain, and a stronger one than Collins had ever felt before. After all, what was not to like about Angel? He was generous, funny, lively, kind, not to mention pretty good looking. But Collins had doubts about what he should do. After all, Collins had never had many good experiences with relationships.

Although he was handsome and charming enough to be one of those people who could have as many lovers as he wanted, Collins had actually only four real relationships under his belt. The first had been in high school, right after he realized "what he was". It was rushed, badly thought out, and awkward. Maureen, who had been one of Collins's closest friends for a while then, managed to help him get out of that whole thing pretty fast. She saw how wrong it was and immediately took charge. Although Maureen had serious judgment issues with her own relationships, when it came to Collins she seemed to have the gut instincts and the understanding of a relationship counselor, a game hunter, and a Buddhist all rolled into one.

His next experience had been a couple months after they all moved to New York. Maureen said she had an "iffy" feeling about the guy, but Collins didn't really care. He acted like a love-struck teenager about the whole thing, which is probably what got him dumped after three months. Maureen once again was there for him, helping him pick up the pieces of his shattered feelings.

Barely two months went by before number three turned up. Maureen said that this guy gave her hives, but to everyone else it seemed a pleasant, normal relationship. That is, until Collins found out that his partner had been seeing two other men and woman continuously since a month before they met. It was, once again, a very bad experience. Maureen joked half-seriously that Collins should consult her about everyone he decided to go out with. That way, her by now famous gut reactions would tell "when it was the right One." Collins scoffed at that. And that might have been why number four turned out the way it did.

By the time everyone found out about it at all, Collins had broken it off, basically because the guy was a complete asshole. Maureen, who had met him once without knowing who he was, made sure Collins knew that this guy had made her nauseous. But she stopped reminding him of how right she was when he came back from his "once-a-year-just-to-be-safe" HIV test with results that shocked them all.

Ever since then, Collins hadn't even considered romantic relationships. Not that anything worse could happen to him because of one; he simply gave up on them. No one at MIT had made him change his opinions, and until earlier that night he had been sure that he would live out his remaining few years single. But now, looking at Angel, he felt something inside, a sensation that was totally and completely new to him. He tried to ignore it, but no matter what he did, it just welled back up every time he looked at the drag queen, or whenever she spoke, or if her hand just brushed his, let alone grabbed it like before. Collins didn't know what it was, but he wasn't sure that he wanted it to go away.

Several hours later, Collins walked down the street, happily listening to the sounds of Mark arguing with Roger, and Maureen, Angel, and Mimi giggling hysterically over something Maureen said. The performance had been pure Maureen; the riot afterwards, while not intended, wasn't enough to ruin any of their moods, not even Maureen's. Collins adjusted the collar of his new coat. It was probably the best one he'd owned in years, and for fifteen dollars. A miracle.

And Angel had gotten it for him. That was the best part. Because that something inside? It had been right. And what he was feeling for Angel, what they were feeling for each other, was different and hundreds of times better than anything from before. This was true. This was.

Maureen finished laughing, said something to Mimi, and backed up, letting the gap between Angel and Mimi close. As Collins walked past her, she grabbed his arm, stretching up to kiss his cheek.

"Hey baby! Back from MIT, I see! Ooh, that rhymed!" Collins laughed. Same old Maureen.

"That was one fucking awesome show, girl! Talk about sticking it to Benny," Collins complimented. Maureen's smile could have been used for a substitute streetlamp, it was that bright. And then her face suddenly took on a strange, mischievous look. Leaning towards him, she whispered in his ear, "Trust me; she's the One for you, baby. My gut says so." Maureen pulled back, winked, and scurried ahead to bother Mark in some fashion. Collins paused, then went to join her. But the smile on his face didn't shrink or dim for the next five minutes.


End file.
